Thursday, December 22, 2011

A Supernatural Shopping List Guest Blog with Amanda Bonilla

A Supernatural Shopping List

Thanks so much to Fangtastic Books for hosting me today! The holidays are always fun, and it was such a challenge to think up an idea for a decent paranormal/holiday post. But I have to say that my sister, Niki, gets mad props for my post today. I threw an idea at her and she ran with it, flooding my inbox with suggestions. She’s pretty dang brilliant! Thanks, sista!

It’s that time of year again! Holiday carols are being pumped through every department store loud-speaker, and cashiers are furiously ringing up purchases. But I bet you last minute shoppers are wondering…What do you get for that hard-to-buy-for supernatural creature on your Christmas list? Well, I’m here to help you out!

Whether you call them werewolves, lycans, or wargs, nothing would make your special moon-swayed friend happier than a beautiful medi-alert bracelet. Silver allergies might surprise some paramedics, but when the moon is full, and your were is running wild, fights can break out. If your loved one is knocked unconscious—or worse—in a full-moon brawl, you’ll rest better at night knowing that the special furry creature in your life is protected from accidentally coming in contact with the potentially deadly metal.

Demons come in all shapes and sizes. If that underworldly creature on your shopping list happens to have horns, nothing says I love you like a tin of organic horn polish. Bees wax and tee-tree oil will give those devilish horns a sheen that will rev up his engine and curl your toes. There’s nothing like seeing the firelight reflect off your demon lover’s horns as he kisses you under the mistletoe.

Ghouls get a bad rap. Not only do they have to eat raw meat to survive, but their diet usually has to include the occasional taste of human flesh. Social situations can be a little…awkward…when you constantly have to pick bits and pieces of your last meal from your preternatural teeth. So get your ghoul a year’s supply of dental floss! You’ll both have more fun at your next holiday gathering and awkward moments will be a thing of the past!

Dating can be tough. Especially in the digital age. And nothing says Happy Holidays! to your succubus and incubus friends like a subscription to E-Harmony and When your very survival depends on “hooking up”, your friend will be thanking you all 365 days of the year as he or she explores the world of on-line dating and those oh-so-special in person meetings.

Let’s face it. Blood stains are hell to get off your teeth and out of your clothes. Nobody knows this better than your vampire buddies. Whether they’re drinking from a bag of O positive or taking it straight from the vein, things can get a little messy. Your special vamps would appreciate nothing more than a big box of Listerine Whitening mouthwash and Spray ‘n Wash. Thanks to you, your bloodsucking friends will have a happy new year when they kiss those stains goodbye!
Everyone has that friend. You know, the mindless minion who does his master’s bidding without thinking for himself. And being the good friend you are, you can help your favorite minion with his New Year’s resolutions by purchasing him some great self-help books. Because how’s he supposed to help his master, if he can’t even help himself?

Your dryad girlfriend might be a little shy. She doesn’t get out much, and she’d rather just take a long walk in the forest. She doesn’t usually come to holiday parties, preferring instead, to hang out on the porch, breathing in the cold night air. For some dryads, the stress of seeing a slaughtered Christmas tree displayed in someone’s living room can just be too much. But you can ease some of that holiday stress by planting a tree in your dryad’s name at the local nature reserve. The Audubon society sponsors a lot of local programs, and with your tree donation, your nature-loving girl will get a magazine subscription! She’ll think fondly of you every time she goes to the post office.

Well, there you have it! Inexpensive solutions for the last-minute supernatural shopper. What would be on your favorite creature’s Christmas list?

Thanks again to Roxanne and Fangtastic Books! I hope everyone has a wonderful holiday season!!

In the shadows of the night, Darian has lived alone for almost a century. Made and abandoned by her former love, Darian is the last of her kind-an immortal Shaede who can slip into darkness as easily as breathing. With no one else to rely on, she has taught herself how to survive, using her unique skills to become a deadly assassin.

When Darian's next mark turns out to be Xander Peck, King of the Shaede Nation, her whole worldview is thrown into question. Darian begins to wonder if she's taken on more than her conscience will allow. But a good assassin never leaves a job unfinished...


Amanda Bonilla said...

Thanks again for hosting a stop on my blog tour!!! :)

Lexi said...

This was a GREAT post! It had me laughing out loud! Very fun to read. =) Thanks!
Can't wait for your book!!

Amanda Bonilla said...

Thanks, Lexi! I have to say, this was a fun post to write. ;)

LoriStrongin said...

hahaha, this was awesome! Man, if you can be such an awesome shopper for your characters, I envy the people in your life. Bet they get some awesome holiday swag!

Seriously awesome guest post!


TheBookFormatter said...

Amanda, t'was fun stopping by your blog post. It's creative. I liked how you used supernatural terms for a Christmas Shopping List. I enjoyed reading it and made me want to finish up to the last full stop. Happy Holidays!

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